Your CI/CD Pipeline is a Dumpster Fire — Here's the Extinguisher 🧯

🎬 Welcome to Pipeline Therapy Let me describe your CI/CD pipeline. Stop me when I'm wrong: It takes 42 minutes to build and deploy Nobody knows exactly what it does (the YAML is 800 lines) Each team has their own custom pipeline because "our needs are different" Flaky tests fail 20% of the time, and everyone just re-runs the pipeline There's a manual approval step where someone clicks "Approve" without looking Someone set it up 3 years ago and that person doesn't work here anymore Was I close? 😏 Let's fix all of this. 📊 DORA Metrics: How to Know If You're Actually Good Before fixing anything, you need to measure where you stand. Google's DORA research (14,000+ teams studied) identified 4 key metrics that predict software delivery performance: Metric │ Elite │ "We Need Help" ─────────────────────────┼────────────────┼────────────────── Deployment Frequency │ Multiple/day │ Monthly or less Lead Time for Changes │ < 1 hour │ > 1 month Change Failure Rate │ 0-15% │ > 45% Mean T